The crowning wish.

The crowning wish

Like the flowing river,

Like time and desire,

Changes, however dear.

When you look back,

You see the decisions

The right and the wrong

The once, you were instinctive,

And the once that took long.

But when you look at as a whole,

The decisions were never wrong.

Coz you believe, whatever happens, happens for good.

Be it the grand dinners, or the night without food.

There is no regret,

Coz you are a positive person.

Coz you adore what you get.

It all comes down to happiness.

No matter how long the chase.

We all find it more or less.

Coz we are men,

With the good and the bad,

That makes us complete.

Happy or sad.

The love gone to dogs.

The love of Gods.

The murders we have committed

Of outstanding possibilities and thoughts,

For the lack of guts.

But they all make us what we are.

Call us coward, call us safe.

We don’t care, we are deaf.

Its all a part of life.

This beautiful wonderful life.

That doesn’t wait for your decisions

Nor for your wishes.

It only flows like the river.

Like time and desire,

However dear.

By Arka Patra

The Hourglass.

Beside the lake, beneath the trees,

I will lie down beside you, about the leaves.

Let the hourglass pass one grain at a time,

As I treasure each moment with you.

The seasons be minutes and the entire eternity in a day passing by.

We’ll let no one be, but you and me to see life go by.

You have become my cocaine and the way out of it…

You maybe no one to everyone but you are the world to me.

Everyone will live, everyone will die.

But I hope we stay side by side.

Prithwish Patra.

After life

What happens when we die?
Obviously, we stop breathing, and our heart stops beating. And so what happens is that within about 10 seconds, brain activity ceases —we become cold.
But that’s what happens to our physical self. What about our souls?
From a Noetic Science experiment in 1988: We now know that, the human soul weighs 1/3,000th of an ounce! That’s the astonishing claim of East German researchers who recently weighed more than 200 terminally ill patients just before, and immediately after, their deaths. In each case the weight loss was exactly the same–1/3,000th of an ounce.” The inescapable conclusion is that we have now confirmed the existence of the human soul and determined its weight,” Dr. Becker Mertens of Dresden said in a letter printed in the German science journal Horizon.
According to acclaimed author, Deepak Chopra- souls stay in layers of time, trapped in parallel universes, in countless worlds.
Okay. So now we know that we have souls. But it only raises more questions than answers, like- what is it like? What exactly happens when we die? Would we know that we no longer breathe? Is it painful? Can we feel the wind on our face or drizzling rain on our skin? Do we smile? Can we think? How do we know that we are dead, if we are dead?
For example if I’d died this very morning, would I know it?
It was a beautiful morning, nothing extraordinary, but just the way I love it! Clouds had sheltered the lush greenery in our garden, from the mercy less tropical sun. The raindrops had ornamented the creamy roses and its vivid leaves with Chrystal droplets. My lazy cat couched on my cosy lap as I sat by the window with my smoking coffee mug. Aww! Just like those old witches from European country. Souls, who have devoted their lives to the mysticisms of nature. I envy those who have all the time they need to observe the love of God in His minutely detailed gifts. I envy those who can harness His warmth from every touch from every smile in every moment of life.
For the rest of us there is only the rush of the day and the fatigued nights. Alarm clocks and lusty porn sites! 
Would it all change if we die, will we have time to see hours pass by? Will I have the time to tell people how much they mean to me? Will I have time to find that girl in white, who once smiled at me, and then vanished in the busy metropolitan swarm?
What if I did die in that road accident this morning, when the speeding car hit my bicycle and knocked me unconscious, flat on the road? 
(The first thing I’d probably do is- I’ll tell my mom that her fish curry sucks!)
Well, I survived without a scratch. I got up and came back home straight. I went to my brother’s room, said “I love you”, and gave him a squeezing hug. It’s actually his bicycle that’s lying in the garage (and it’s not in one piece)!

“They only see what they want to see…they don’t know that they are dead” – a quote from the 1999 movie THE SIXTH SENSE, a psychological horror film written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan.
When I got back to my room I noticed that my lazy fat assed cat was comfortably couched on the pillow by the window, just where I left it, the steaming coffee mug rests by its side. Wait a sec. how is the coffee still steamy? I remember I finished it well before I left! That’s weird!
But any ways! Now, if I were dead by any chance (and M. Night Shyamalan is to be believed), I would really wana see that fat ass cat do rumba like Garfield. Right now!
Naa, I actually like the way it’s sleeping, with all the peace and pleasure. There is, a certain calm, a certain serenity to it. It is a beautiful morning, nothing extraordinary, but just the way I love it!

It is a work of friction .

By Arka Patra.

.

 Happy Birthday Blog(belated).


I missed you a lot pal.I will post soon.

And for those of you don't know it was my blog's birthday last month.Well I created it in last year of august. I don't remember the perfect date,but my blog properties says it was in august. 

Now, on covering of the 1st year I wanna do some thanks:

• To my blog (M.I.C.). It was for you that I started writing on the first place. THANK YOU.
• To my brother for editing my works and giving me certain ideas. He digs tunnels in my dead ends, I wouldn't be here. Well I would be here but I wouldn't have been doing what I'm doing. THANK YOU.
• To my English tutor. He has supported me and promoted M.I.C to some extent. THANK YOU.
• Jayne Reisbeck, always my second reader and a huge supporter. THANK YOU.
• The people from Sahitya group from Facebook, for the comments on my work and posting me in dhavaria.com.THANK YOU.

• And to all my readers who have clicked and will click on the link or typed it, spent at least a second here.          THANK YOU ALL.

NOTE : I have been recently posted in dhavaria.com, do check it out. 

Link : http://www.dhavaria.com/2012/07/26/the-rush/

                                                                  PRITHWISH PATRA.

 

Envy.

I live a life of a martyr,

I have the mortal greed of earthly things,

I have envy for those who live their lives.

I have the greed for love.

I have the envy for life.

The greed that is suppressed within me,

Ever expressed will drown me,

Along with my life and the greed to live more.

                                                                  Prithwish Patra.

HOW TO LEAD A DOUBLE LIFE.

This title may be mindboggling to some, and some might think it’s near impossible and as always morons would think it as bullshit and pass on. So much for first impressions. In this article I will tend to tell you my theory of a dual life. And I can guaranty you it’s not what you think it is and it’s quite possible.  NO I’m not talking schizophrenia.

There are some moral truths a common person is familiar with these are imbedded in their heads or they just figure it out as the person grows up. First and foremost: YOU CAN NOT FLY! (Well except airplanes and stuff). Second is: YOU DO NOT HAVE ANY KIND OF SUPER POWERS! The third is: YOU MOSTLY DO NOT GET WHAT YOU WANT!

So if are told to make a small box in your head and put all those moral truths in it and throw it in the Mariana trench, can you do that?  When you are done with that please read on.

In my thoughts, the person who can dream and can imagine can have a second life. That includes 99% of the world’s population so almost every one can have a second life. Dreams and imaginations are the mediums of reaching and making a second life. There are certain things you can’t, shouldn’t, couldn’t, wouldn’t do in reality. But there are no boundaries to be broken in one’s dreams. One’s imagination is different than others. It depends on the person you are, things you do, the things you think about, your memories, expectations, your plans, your dreams, your worries, your nightmares, your past, present, future. One can find deep forests in between grey skyscrapers, wonderlands with yellow purple nameless flowers, we have forever opened doors to worlds that are waiting to be made, recognized, experienced, cherished, shared! Your mind can be the only guide book you will need! It doesn’t matter if you know where to go or not. You will always know where to go. It’s the only place where being wrong is right and well being right is also right! It’s a place where you can make skyscrapers out of smoke. You can just tell a girl “love u” without fearing the consequences. It’s also a place for rejoicing with old friends; you can have endless conversation with people you know. And people you don’t. The person you met at the subway, but never exchanged a word. You can walk endless roads holding hands and not fearing the other person will let go. You can plan a family, kids and even sharing your retirement salary with that stranger you only exchanged a glance.

 It’s a place where every kid is a superhero, and everyman is the king of his kingdom.

Every man is a king of his kingdom….

No matter what happens you should not lose your throne. In simpler words, you should not do things that lowers yourself self respect and end up losing yourself and there by thinking that you are not appropriate for the place! YOU AND ONLY YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO DECIDE WHAT YOU IMAGINE.

Dreams are glaciers of memories waiting to melt and flood though your mind. They can be called the uncontrolled visions that one has. It’s like a movie being played where you are the director. The beauty of dreams is that it plays itself and it takes up situations, characters (real and imaginary), events & everything going in your mind and puts them in one place. I had a glimpse in a dream once of a friend parking a cycle (I don’t know if it was his or not!! But who cares!) under a small dark bridge in Madrid. I figured it to be Spain because of the bricks on the roads were same as I have known to be used in small alley ways in Spain and places like that! Just that I have never been to Spain, neither had the friend I saw!!

When you are in are in a dream you automatically forget all the moral truths and most importantly you don’t realize that it’s a dream till you get out of it. The fantasy becomes your reality.

I had nightmares of falling. You can think I am a weirdo on reading the next line but it’s true: I like falling from buildings (in dreams of course!) it’s not like I would like to suicide but I like how the dream go on and the after effect of it. Let me explain a bit: imagine you are falling from a high building without any reason but you are just falling! As soon as you reach the ground, you wake up. The following thoughts come to your mind: I JUST FELL OF A BUIDING! HOW THE HELL AM I STILL ALIVE! IT WAS JUST A DREAM!

I like it because it’s kind of a death like experience just without any actual danger (if you don’t consider sleepless nights as a danger that is…). Just to know how it would be to die.

Imaginations are pretty controlled. If you decide to go right you will go right. When you imagine something with utmost concentration you leave your conscious and enter into a trance, where control is reduced considerably.

As one’s reality influences one’s second life, one’s second life also influences one’s reality! You can’t help the moral truths coming in your way in reality though.

Here is a trick I learnt from a friend and it really works: They say life is always unexpected so we have to expect the unexpected! In other words if you want positive results, imagine it to be negative! Life would work its way and present you POSITIVE RESULTS!

Then again someone will say that if you surround yourself with positive thoughts, positive things will happen to you.

So it’s not about me or someone else telling you. It’s about YOU.

THERE IS MORE TO THIS WORLD AND ALSO OUR RELAITY.

 YOU JUST HAVE TO CLOSE YOUR EYES!  

                                                                                                                      Prithwish Patra. 

                     A few delightful places.

This is side corridor of the church....
many haven't been here.

its the same corridor just from a different angle.

The church.....

The front statue.

The main alter

this is one of my favorite pics clicked by my bro.
It's from a ghat in the Strand road. 

The Rush.

“And thus they have low economy!” the geography teacher finished the paragraph …. I had dug my head in copy to take notes so did most of the students in the class! At a glance one would suppose our class is the most studious class of the school and the teacher is the best one…. But believe me we are not, most of us get sleepy in this particular class, we are just eager to get pass marks on the answers scripts and also escape humiliation from parents and the teacher in front of us is the not the best but just better than the other one.

I heard a slow whisper. It was not the teacher’s voice. It whispered with my name….. I raised my head, curiosity withheld me it was the physics lab-assistant! (Many boys had a crush on her but not me!!)But why call out my name. The teacher spotted me out. This has never happened I never got called out for anything in the middle of the class. I stood up. She said that my brother has come to pick me up as my grandpa’s ill!

 Grandpa!!! What the hell! How did he….. He isn't supposed to be……

 

I took my bag and slowly followed her out of the room; she led me downstairs where I saw my bro. I was shaking in my boots all the way. I asked him “What happened to whom??” but he didn’t say a word.

The woman instructed me to go to my class teacher who was taking class in the third floor to inform him that I was leaving the school. I went to him to the third floor and with my half choked voice told him that my brother has come to… he came out half hearing that and I pointed towards my bro. My bro said in a loud voice (so that he can be heard from the 3^rd floor) that he had to pick me up because our grandpa’s ill! He said it’s ok and I can go if my bro writes a letter saying that he is here to pick me up (we never go out of formalities!) I came down slowly and saw that my bro is already in the school office getting started on the letter. I came in and stood beside him. His hand was visibly shaky. He finished the four lined letter and came out and fortunately the cycle keeper was there so I didn't have to wait to take out my bicycle. I got up on my cycle so did my bro and paddled towards our home.

“Now can you tell me what exactly happened!!?” I finally said.

“Chorda’s dead!” he said and I waited for him to complete the sentence. “You are not supposed to tell this anybody at home. They have informed mom and told her to take dad and leave…..we are going to Amta!”  

 I didn't say anything more……..

 

Two days earlier:

“But I have holiday on this day so I can manage this!!” I said “NO ! not in time……” my dad chocked a little  “I said no and that’s final we should be together at this point of time…..” I couldn't say anything more.

Our trip to Amta was cancelled due to my bro had to join college at that time. I wouldn't have cared but I had a exam at tuitions which I didn't wanna give and I thought that I will gap it off  by this tour!!

Any-ways I went to my bro and said “why do you have to join college so soon! Can’t you just help me miss the exams!!?”

He gave me his sarcastic eye look “You know I can’t do that! And you also know chorda’s condition….”

“Ya I know,but...”

 

He had been ill for many days now he had been admitted in a hospital a while ago and was discharged but had a stroke just the night he came back…..so he had to be carried again to the hospital. He had been unconscious since. Doctors have stated his condition to be critical.

 

Present time:

We reached home, put our cycles and entered into the room, it was a mess. My mom made an excuse that my grandpa’s ill.

“We had to leave before they come back.” My mom said in a whisper.

I quickly changed and took some clothes to wear over there as I didn’t want to be in my grandpa’s pajamas again! I took my wallet and the school bag which was now stuffed with my clothes (me & bro always carry a bag). In the meantime my cousin came back she has got the news (my chorda was her elder brother). She saw us going out, fought her tears and wished us a safe journey and told us to take care of my dad.

 We came out of the house and waited for an auto rickshaw. Hopefully we got one. We reached the station soon and boarded the train and we were off to Amta.

 

I just couldn't get my head straight… one hour ago I was reading Bangladesh’s economy and the next thing you know my cousin’s dead and I’m rushing to my grandpa’s house to save my dad from another cardiac arrest!

We got on the train and started towards our destination. “The wind started to blow faster...” my bro said facing the window. We (me & my bro) consider bad weather to be great. It’s just so much fun! “Ya I noticed …”I replied. “Why do all these bad things happen in this kind of good weathers!?” then he started to give the list of the times when there had been bad things in our lives in good weather. I turned away…..

One day earlier:

“His health just got worse …..But he came in conscious last night…..he was asking for me...” I heard the whispering of my dad to mom….

“You don’t worry …. Everything will be fine ….. He will be ok...” my mom replied

I was hearing from the back of the door …. After hearing this I couldn't stand there I came back upstairs.

 

Present time:

I kept thinking how things didn’t go just fine…

“Do you know that girl…” my bro suddenly said.

“Do I wanna know her?” I said checking my stuff in my bag… and also kind of showing no interest in hitting at this point of time.

“NO! Absolutely not ewww! ” He explained with a disgusted tone “but she has been staring at us from the time we got up on the train!!”

 “Oh really? Are we that much of a looker! ” I felt the need to look up… “You were right…. I really really don’t wanna know her! ” no matter how bad I need a girlfriend I still got taste!

“Let’s go ask her if we are supposed to know her or not!” my bro almost got up! I held him back, “have you lost your mind look by her side she has got parents!! And we are with dad!! ”

“Come ’n they look like her grandparents!!” he added, and they really did look like grandparents maybe they were her grandparents!

We looked at our dad once … he was a bench away and had his head hung down…..

“Leave it …I don’t wanna get in trouble with that man by my side!” he said and sat down with a great a thrust as if with exhaustion.

And there she was sitting there five benches away with a red woolen hood staring at us for no particular reason (at least we didn’t find any!!)

By the time we were in the train we were with dad’s phone to listen to songs to cut the boringness of the journey and to minimize eye contact with the red hooded girl, sometimes receiving calls from cousins and telling them out where about and stuff and occasionally taking about the red riding hood!!

 

 

The train halted at Howrah. We completed the first half of the journey, now we just have to board another train to reach Amta.

We alerted dad and got down; me and my bro were going side by side my dad little ahead.

I turned around a bit to see if I could find red riding hood or not (just to keep safe!) I turned back again in the front direction.

“What?” my bro asked. “Nothing Ms. Weird is just behind us and still in wonder gaze!” I answered 

Over the next few minutes we found my mother, who was in the ladies compartment all this time. She confirmed from us if he had suspected about chorda or not, and then moved on.

The girl was walking side by side with us but keeping a distance (but still staring). Then on platform no. 8 she had to turn and we kept on going. She was gone to the other side, and we were going, just like nothing happened.

 

 

 

My chorda was the one person who cared about others greater than himself. He was the person one can depend on ...no matter what. He never took life seriously and nobody took him seriously. He went where other people led him to he didn’t judge good or bad…he just went for. They say you realize something’s importance when you have lost it. Maybe that also happened this time. He was the man who taught both me and my bro cycling, and also made me realize that the cycle never stops…losing him would mean losing a large part of my family.

 

Epilog:

We reached Amta the horinam had started. We are not allowed to take part in it as the recent family death. We found out that my grandpa had really been sick and he fell unconscious and had to be carried to the hospital a day before. My dad had to be carried to the hospital as he also got too much sick thinking about what happened to chorda and receiving no good news and only short messages from cousins which were of course lies. I myself got sick of hearing the same lines in horinam. I didn’t own a phone at that time so I had informed my friends at school that I won’t be able to make it to school for the next couple of days from my mom’s phone. I didn’t get time to take any books in the rush so I had to watch the t.v all the days I was there but it was hard as the horinam guys kept singing the same line over and over again and with loudspeakers! As my dad was in the hospital we didn’t find the need to stay there so came back in a few days as soon as most of the funeral rituals were over at our home.

Blogger’s Note: All the said events really did occur, there may some altering of the events but they are real.

 

 

   

Confessions of a lover.

You have stepped in my dreams as if they were reality.

Now I can only dream of getting you back.

Left me alone in the dark room,

The windows closed one by one….losing the light it had,

Hoped you that you would come back.

But you never came so I still sit today waiting for you,

In the same dark room.

I tried to keep my promise to be by your side ….always

But you have broken yours….

Every word that you said is in my heart stitched, with the golden threads.

But now they are wearing out so will I someday.

Remember you asked me in play : about my first kiss…

I lied …I wanted it to be with you!

I’m here to confess:

Our meeting wasn’t incidental….

I saw you

Took me time to find out who you were….

And everything else followed.

But if I hadn’t met you I would have failed to know myself!

Haven’t I told you this as I feared losing you ….

But now I have nothing else to do but to say that I loved you!

As I still do…don’t let this love fade, please come back to me.

If I have done wrong please tell me my sins

But don’t go away!

If you think I’m unsuitable for you please tell me so….

I would leave the golden threads to rust.

I would disappear

But please relief me of this guilt…

But just tell me…..

                                                                                                                             Prithwish Patra.

Blogger’s note : Very few people know who this poem is addressed to and I want it to be that way…hope she finds it…..